Friday, November 23, 2018

Becoming And Being

It is both a fact of physics and metaphysics that we are always in a state of becoming. Indeed, the entire world, as we perceive it, is in that state, while simultaneously, and paradoxically, we also always exist in a state of being. Becoming and being exist for us in every moment, they are our constant companions and no matter how hard we try, we have no control over the facts of either. This becoming and being is what each of us are are, right now.

On this lazy day after Thanksgiving, I've been reflecting on these words from Mister Rogers:

There are many times that I wish I had heard that "just who you are at this moment, with the way that you're feeling is fine. You don't have to be anything more than who you are right now." I'd like to think it's also something that's happened to me through the years, that I'm more able to accept myself as I happen to be, rather than as somebody thought I should be.

Love does not seek to change or correct or manage, but rather to accept and help others to achieve, in this moment, their highest potential, not as others define it, but as they do. And this goes for self love as well. It's easy to fall into the trap of being dissatisfied with ourselves or others, to think, "If I could only . . ." or "If they would only . . ." But it's not until we can accept ourselves and others for who we or they are, right now, that love can exist.

Each person in the world is a unique human being, and each has unique human potential. One of the important tasks of growing is the discovery of this uniqueness: the discovery of "who I am" in each of us -- of "who I am" in relation to all those whom I meet.

This doesn't mean that we don't strive to become better selves, only that growth cannot happen, or uniqueness cannot be discovered, until we first radically accept who we are, and equally important, who they are. Because we don't grow alone: our highest potential can only be achieved together.

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