Turning The Other Cheek

In the gospel of Matthew, Jesus says, "You have heard that it was said, 'Eye for eye, and tooth for tooth.' But I tell you, do not resist an evil person. If anyone slaps you on the right cheek, turn to them the other cheek also. And if anyone would sue you and take your tunic, let him have your cloak as well. And if anyone forces you to go one mile, go with him two miles."

In psychology, this principle is called a non-complementary response. Typically, if someone slaps another person, they expect to be slapped back . . . or kicked, or cursed out, or at least to be reported to the authorities -- this would be a complementary response. As humans, our tendency is to mirror one another, for better or worse, but Jesus was suggesting something far more radical.

For the last several decades, Norwegian prisons have embraced the principle of the non-complementary response. In stark contrast to most prisons in the world that operate on the basis of an eye-for-an-eye, or in many cases two-eyes-for-an-eye, these prisons turn the other cheek. Prisoners, even those convicted of violent crimes, are given nicely furnished rooms instead of cells, complete with flat screen TVs and private bathrooms. There are few locks and no bars. The guards are unarmed and nearly fifty percent women. Inmates are free to move about the facilities, to enjoy various recreations and other pursuits at their leisure. They have cook-outs and parties. There is one maximum security prison, a place that houses the worst of the worst, that is set in a bucolic forest on an island and has its own music recording studio that releases albums under its own label. There is a church, a grocery store, and a library. If this doesn't sound like prison, that's the point.

This non-complentary prison is set up to be as much like normal life as possible. This means that the prisoners also grow and cook much of their own food, they have jobs to do to keep their community running. Some of them even commute to nearby jobs. 

Norway boasts the lowest recidivism rate in the world. Most of these ex-convicts leave prison much better able to function in normal society than when they went in.

If the goal is to rehabilitate humans, rather than punish them, then it appears that Jesus was right: turning the other cheek works. The principles of non-complimentary responses and normality work.

When looked at from this perspective, the goal of educators is much the same as the goal of these Norwegian prisons: to give people, whatever their age, the skills, knowledge, habits, and experiences that will allow them to function productively in society. As the Norwegians see it, since most prisoners will not spend their lives in prison. They will be released at some point and isn't it better to release a good neighbor rather than a resentment-filled ticking time bomb? 

Schools aren't exactly prisons, but standard schools certainly share much in common with standard prisons. Both involve confined humans whose movements, even within the facility, are restricted; they are told where to be and what to do; they are punished for disobedience; their fellow humans are to be regarded as rivals; they spend precious little time outdoors; there is little privacy; the work they do is meaningless, unpaid, and dictated by the "guards." In other words, there is little that happens in either institution that would be considered "normal" outside of that institution. Children might not be leaving school as ticking time bombs (although some are), but they are hardly being prepared for a real world in which personal responsibility, self-motivation, teamwork and companionability are the keys to success. 

As a preschool teacher who has always worked in play-based programs, I've strived to apply the principles of non-complimentary responses and normality to everything we do, even if I've not always used those terms. This means we don't rely on punishments, but rather upon the non-complimentary response of teaching, of offering alternatives, of guiding children toward listening, then finding a way to restore and repair any damage they have done. This may not exactly reflect the "real world" as it stands today, but it certainly reflects the world in which I want to one day live. This means that we don't make up work for the children to do. We avoid commanding or controlling them. We leave them free to make their own decisions in the context of community, for better or worse, which is the way the world outside our walls work. It's how we learn to live with the other people. When children find themselves in situations where they are trusted, in which their mistakes are opportunities to learn rather than causes for punishment, and where they are free to ask and answer their own questions about the world as members of of a community, they are having experiences through which they will learn the skills, knowledge, and habits that will allow them to function productively in society.

The goal of school, like the goal of Norwegian prisons, should be to "release" humans into the world who are responsible, self-motivated, and work well with others. These are the secrets to success, however you define it. Or in other words, what Jesus said.

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