When our daughter Josephine was in kindergarten, one of her classmates was a boy named Jaan who we've known since he was two: long enough to have formed our own relationship, one not mediated through his parents.
Like many 5-year-old boys, he was interested in exploring power of all kinds, but mostly of the biff-bam-kapow action variety. One day we got into a game of one-upsmanship that started with him "shooting" me with a cannon, a weapon he claimed to be the most powerful in the universe.
I replied by saying, "If you had a cannon, I would dodge your cannon balls, then give you a hug full of love. You would be so happy that you would decide to turn your cannon into a flower pot . . . And we both would win." He shook his head and walked away in a show of comical defeat.
This then evolved into a good-natured, slow-motion argument that took place over the course of months. Each time we saw one another, which was quite often, he would be ready with a new proposal for something that was more powerful than love, often choosing something from the news.
A hurricane? "I would hide from the hurricane with the people I love and when it was over, I would still be here and the hurricane wouldn't . . . And we both would win."
The sun? "The sun is only out half the time, my love will always be there . . . And we both would win."
At first, I think he was genuinely trying to top me, and our discussions would go several rounds, but after awhile, he began to concede his "defeat" right away, with a simple smile and a shrug. I got the sense that as he considered more and more terrible things, it made him happy to be assured that love was the most powerful thing in the universe.
Thank you for this beautiful post. Gun play has just begun to enter my 5 year old's life, and therefore his 3.5 year old brother's life as well. I kept it from them as long as I could, but it is here. In the past, when their friends would pretend to shoot a gun at me or them, I would say " oh no! You just got me with your love gun! Now I have to hug you!" and would chase them around until I could smooch them. I do this with my boys still, and they enjoy it. But I am still quite discomfited by the gun play, and while I have given the rule that they are not to point the "guns" at a living thing, it has been bumpy enforcing it, and they delight in pushing that boundary. I do like this beautiful, playful response that you provided.
ReplyDeleteYour response has the same rhythm as "Runaway Bunny." If you become a crocus in a hidden garden, I will be a gardener and I will find you."
ReplyDeleteI thought the line "For you are my little bunny," (your version: and we both would win) appeared after each stanza, but if checked and it is only he first. I guess I just add it internally.
Either way, I guess these are pretty much the same story.
<3 <3 <3
ReplyDelete<3 <3 <3
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